11 January 2018

The Mark Wood Poem

Please. Stop. The. Mark. Wood. Hype. Train.

Ever since Flintoff retired, the legendary world-beater,
England have struggled to find a third seamer.
It was the only place available in 2010.
Now, despite the efforts of the punchy Ben,

They don't like Stokes, a drunken beater;
England are still looking for a third seamer.
Liam and Craig and Steve and Chris,
Jake, Tom, Toby, and other Chris.

I didn't mention Mark, England like him best.
He's always injured, never fit. Anyway, I digress.
In his career he averages 41 in test cricket.
Last year he leaked 197 for just 1 wicket.

If it's because "he bowls fast", let's pick Meaker instead(!)
After all, he'll bowl it at the Kiwis' head.
Or let's pick Mills, and bowl 2-over spells.
He'll win in New Zealand, let's sound the church bells.

I don't think Mark Wood should play in tests.
If he leaks again, we'll be in a mess.
Speed isn't everything after all, you know.
Consistency makes for a much better show.

Just ask Mitchell Johnson, he let his side down;
Bowling total crap made Ricky Ponting frown.
Therefore, the Wood hype train needs to be stopped.
I think the selectors, when babies, on their heads, were dropped.

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